Pregnancy Etiquette- For Others Not Pregnant Women

Please excuse my rant that follows but I feel like if I don't get it out, I am going to EXPLODE! I feel like this is something that needs to be said because everyone needs to understand that just because a woman is pregnant, you do not have free reign to comment about her weight, appearance, eating habits, or any other topic that you would not broach with someone who is not pregnant. We do not stop being human or become immune to negativity- your comments do hurt.

I never realized that being pregnant opens you up to lots of comments and judgments, most of which are unwanted. I haven't quite figured out during which part of my pregnancy the age old adage "If you don't have something nice to say, don't say anything at all" stopped applying to me.

But just to throw this out there - in case you didn't know (which apparently A LOT of people do not!)- here are some things that you should not say to a pregnant woman:

• Wow! By the time you have that baby it will weight 40 pounds!
• Are you eating again? (This one really chapped my behind because I eat healthy small snacks through out the day such as fresh fruit, yogurt, pretzels etc. and this came from a woman who is constantly eating junk food at her desk. I felt like Seth and Amy on SNL- "Really!?")
• Are you gaining like a pound a day now?
• You are due when? You'll be as big as a house by then!
• Are you sure there are not two in there? (This one gets old really fast and I kid you not, as I was typing this a woman just walked into my cube and asked me this very question.)
• Are you practicing your exercises- I mean your kegels? (Completely inappropriate coming from a male co-worker!)

My list could go on forever but I think I have hit the highlights at least. The sad thing is that I hear most of the comments at work from co-workers that I don't discuss my personal life with but I guess they feel like they know me well enough to comment on it!

A little over 31 weeks

Most of the time I feel pretty secure and at times confident about how I look pregnant. I'm enjoying how I look so much that I am getting maternity photos done! I feel like I have treated my body well by eating healthy and exercising. I am a petite, narrow framed woman who has 20+ pounds on me that didn't used to be there, of course I am going to look different or bigger than a woman who is taller or has a larger frame to distribute the weight. But when I hear these negative remarks multiple times a day (No, unfortunately I am not exaggerating.), it can really bring me down. If you feel so compelled to comment on a pregnant woman's appearance, just say "You look great!" and leave it at that.

So please, for me and all other pregnant women who are still aware of our self-image and still have the same feelings that every other woman has, remember that our bodies are still that- our bodies and are not there for you to comment on. If you are unsure as to whether or not your comment will be well received, maybe take a second and think about it and then ask yourself, "Should I say this to someone who has so many excess hormones running through her body that even if I don't mean anything by it she is liable to break down and cry or rip my head off?" If your answer is no, then keep your comment to yourself. Pregnancy is a time when women battle with their body image. Our bodies are constantly changing and things that once looked familiar no longer do. We do not need other people highlighting the things that we are already sensitive about.

And now that I have gotten that off my chest, I feel much better!